Premier League - Punchable XI (current)

[Flaggers]

OK - close-season silliness.

It's widely known that Fulham's ex-Sheep, Harry Wilson, has the most punchable face in football.

Richarlison needs punching, as does Anthony Gordon. Bruno Fernandes finds himself on that list too.

Can we put together a "Current Premier League Punchable XI" with every position filled, plus subs and manager?

 

[Dirk Furtull]

Not that I condone physical violence but Will Hughes has to be on that list.

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[MaxiRobriguez]

Pickford in net.

You've already got an advanced midfield so you need someone to anchor it, and the biggest anchor in my opinion is Reuben Neves.

Will leave defence and forwards to others.

 

[Timothy Pope]

I think Pickford is more of a bitch slap than a punch

 

[DanR]

I would like to nominate Paul Heckingbottom as manager.

If McBurnie is classed as Premier League then perhaps a space on the bench could be found for him?

 

[Rzar]

Pickford
Ayling, Mings, Lisandro, Robertson
Neves, Fernandes (C), Harvey Elliot
Anthony, Richarlison, Garnacho

Manager: Klopp

Struggled for a right back

 

[Strummer]

Antony from Man U has to be in there somewhere - he is an absolute f***ing walloper and deserves a slap, especially considering the stories coming out regarding his behaviour outside of football from his former partner.

 

[Ashley]

A distinct lack of Sheffield United players in these suggestions (McBurnie aside). Heckingbottom a shoe in for manager too surely?

Agree with the Pickford, Fernandes and Richarlison suggestions. All absolute bellends.

 

[Project Zeus]

Pickford, all done long.

Fernández on the recoil.

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[Rzar]

A distinct lack of Sheffield United players in these suggestions (McBurnie aside). Heckingbottom a shoe in for manager too surely?

Agree with the Pickford, Fernandes and Richarlison suggestions. All absolute bellends.

My theory is their season will be so miserable that they’ll spend all season crying that they will hardly be classed as a Premier League team.

 

[Ashley]

My theory is their season will be so miserable that they’ll spend all season crying that they will hardly be classed as a Premier League team.

So a Derby County 07/08-esque scenario? I'd be happy with that!

 

[DanR]

I'm waiting around to see Eddie Yates nominate Phil Foden.

 

[DanR]

Who was the Wolves player who (didn't) flob at Brennan? Podence? Get him in there if so!

 

[Omar Devone Little]

Kepa
Mina Zouma Jack Robinson
Hughes Neves Fernandes Garnacho
Richarlison McBurnie Podence

Manager: Heckingbottom
Assistant manager: Thomas Frank

Wasn't sure whether I could include Mason Greenwood or not.

 

[DanR]

Mina and Zouma are good shouts.

 

[Flaggers]

Who was the Wolves player who (didn't) flob at Brennan? Podence? Get him in there if so!

Haven't seen the word flob used for YEARS!

 

[Ashley]

Mina and Zouma are good shouts.

Forgot about that cat kicking twat Zouma. Straight in the starting XI.

 

[Ashley]

Kepa
Mina Zouma Jack Robinson
Hughes Neves Fernandes Garnacho
Richarlison McBurnie Podence

Manager: Heckingbottom
Assistant manager: Thomas Frank

Wasn't sure whether I could include Mason Greenwood or not.

Swap Kepa for Pickford and I think you might have nailed it there.

 

[Rzar]

Podence is alright. He has his moment against us but that was an anomoly and not the norm from his career.

Players like Fernandes, Richarlison, Anthony are consistent over their career of being absolute nobs.

 

[DocForest]

That Garnacho has always been an odious little prick. Despised him since that Youth Cup final, when he gave it the big one against our 16 year olds.
He'll continue to get worse amongst that United team.

 

[Eddie Yates]

Phil Foden & Jack Greilish

 

[Eddie Yates]

There must be a place for the Redknapp family

 

[Omar Devone Little]

Swap Kepa for Pickford and I think you might have nailed it there.

He annoyed me with that refusal to come off business in the cup final and he's been on the shit list ever since.

 

[Flaggers]

There must be a place for the Redknapp family

That'll be for the "Premier League - All-Time Punchable XI'....

 

[Trents]

Anthony Gordon, 11 times in the face.