Notcher
Stuart Pearce
I'll share my only sending off story. I was playing non league at the time and the opponents had a guy sitting in DM (he looked just like Zidane, which is quite funny to the story later). Anyway after about 15 minutes this guy tracked me f***ing everywhere, which was a bit odd as I was a striker and he was a good player but probably under instruction as I was having a good game and giving the CB's the runaround. The funny thing was the more he was getting into me and frustrated he became the more I was pulling his pants down, to the point where I could hear him steaming in from the side so I'd stop and roll it around him. Like I said he was a good player but his head had all but popped off at this point.
Fast forward to the 70th minute and having already scored in the first half and full of confidence (okay, arrogance) I've unleashed one from 25 yards and it's found the top corner, right in the bracket, one of our supporters behind the goal had a cigar on which was perfect so went over and borrowed it giving it the look of I'm doing this with slippers and a cigar on.
I kid you not about 2 mins later this fella has tried exactly the same shot but completely spannered it, almost to the corner flag. So as he's turned around to drop back on half way for the goal kick I said "come and stand next to me mate, I'll talk you though my goal" over he came (remember Zidane) BOSH, he headbutted me, my nose bust everywhere. Everyone was shocked however even his own teammate's said to me "what are you waiting for, hit him". That's all the encouragement I needed, wallop, my taped up ring wasn't enough to stop his eye splitting and that was me. Worth every penny of the fine too.
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